Banwell Bowling Club

The Pond,Banwell,
Somerset. UK

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Website - Just about up to date

Right People your dynamic,charismatic and charming webmaster
has been working his socks off to update the website
and bring you the latest news.

  • The Umbrella Competition is now fully up to date
  • The internal matches as at 10th July now up to date
  • All friendly matches up to date (Where I have receiced the cards Captain's)
  • The league tables and reports are now up to date
  • So go to it people and marvel at the literary skills on offer

Stunning Victory in the North Somerset Knockout Cup

Well it all went right on the night. An emphatic win to take us onto the next round of this Knockout Cup.
Banwell won on four rinks and drew on the fifth.

Rink of the evening was JD and his merry men who stormed their way through to a 40-17 win

I understand we meet either Clevedon or Ashcombe in the next round.
Well done lads

Rink 1
Rink 2
Rink 3
Rink 4
Rink 5
Won by 22 shots to 14
Drew 19 shots each
Won 40 shots to 17
Won 24 shots to 12
Won 26 shots to 7

Result: Banwell 131 shots - Chew Stoke 69 shots

News updates - Odds and Sods

Is this a rare photo?

Could this hastily snapped photo become
a collectors item, will it be worth thousands
of pounds when we are gone?

Who knows, but I was so taken aback
when I saw Barry on the wrong side of the
bar, and, washing glasses that I had to record
this event for posterity.

But do not worry, kindly folk led him
gently back to the correct side of the bar
and after a medicinal pint of Ansells
he was back to his old self.

Should we keep this photo?

The jury is out !!


Barry Taylor behind the bar

Banwell hit the headlines in the Weston Mercury

Below a photocopy of the bowls page in this weeks Weston Mercury
featuring an athletic display of bowling by no other than Dave Mabbutt


Only Mad Dogs and Englishmen go out in the Midday Sun !!

It would appear that this prolonged spell of hot weather and the sun beating down on defenceless bowls players
has played havoc with reasonable thinking and sensible behaviour.

Below are just a few examples.....

No 1. The Story of Shaun White dressing up in his wife's clothes

Photos: Paul Aldus

Shaun White Shaun White

It was one of those hot days and Shaun White
had forgotten to bring a hat....Panic !! Would the
sun beat down on his exposed head and drive him mad?

But help was at hand. his good wife made the ultimate sacrifice and offered him her hat. She would take refuge in the cool of the bar.

So the day was saved...Is Shaun a cross dresser? What other items of his wife's clothes does he borrow? We will never know. Seems a nice boy though !!

Captain to be sent on extensive writing and spelling course

Captain Phil Villis. Is he under Pressure?

Sorry Phil but I could not leave this one off the website.

The Captain's task is, well, lets say a trifle arduous. Lots of duties
to perform before, during, and after an important match.
And of course one of those duties is to make the cards out.

Never mind Phil we were going to send you on
an expensive, extensive English course.

But this will never happen after the treasurer
kicked up a fuss with phrases such as..

Can't teach an old dog new tricks
It would be a waste of money
He is the only Captain I know who sharpens his pencil at both ends so
that if picks the wrong end he can still write something.

But Phil did you know that SHEILD stands for:

Social Humanitarian economical intervention for local development

And this society is based in the Lebanon

So you can tell that to the treasurer.

Banwell successful in the first game of the Parrott Shield Competition

And so the battle for the 2018 Parrott Shield commenced.
After days of hot sunshine, it rained in the afternoon, which
altered the playing surface of the green, and made it just a touch heavier.

But at the end of the evening, Winscombe had won on three rinks
and Banwell on the other two. But the two winning rinks were substantial
and enabled Banwell to end the game 14 shots up.

But 14 shots is nothing to write home about and the return match at Winscombe could prove to be interesting

Rink 1
Rink 2
Rink 3
Rink 4
Rink 5
Lost 14 shots to 19
Won 36 shots to 5
Lost 14 shots to 21
Won 25 shots to 16
Lost 12 shots to 26

Result: Banwell 101 shots - Winscombe 87 shots

Banwell go into the next game with a 14 shot advantage - This game will be played at WInscombe on 18th July. 6.15pm start

It could only happen at Banwell Bowls Club
  Mal Laycock

Picture of the week
Taken by Pauline Mabbutt

The scene.... Triples Day Finals

Pauline looked up saw this little old wizened fellow
shuffling along, bent double under the weight
of a basket, containing a tin of 'Jacobs Cream Crackers'

Good Gracious they are not filming The Hobbit down here at the Bowls Club, she mused. Could this be a dwarf, a diminutive humanoid or even a subset of middle man.
A hobbit fellow in the flesh?

So just in case she snatched up her mobile
and banged off a shot. Nice one Pauline

And more to the point Mal Laycock you can't
blame me this time !!


And now... From the sublime to the ridiculous

  Paul Wifan

Yes it's that guardian of the law Paul Wilfan, or Wilmott as he is known to his friends. So what has he been up to now?

Hot on the trail of Paul's little conflagration, with his purchase of oversized ‘Y’ fronts when on tour with the club, comes yet another gripping tale of intrigue and fascination.Once again it involves the purchase of clothing, which as we are now well aware
Paul is not at his best on this type of project.

But to continue….. So our hero marches into TK Maxx, where one can purchase sharp designer suits,
trendy blazers and a lot more for the modern man

.“A shirt is what I need”
muttered Willmott as he foraged among the shirts.
“Aha this is it, just the job”

He extracted a shirt from the rail and rushed off to pay for it.



But alas a tail of woe and distress was about to unfold.

Of course ,when he got home and tried it on it was far too big for him
and after a few expletives phoned TK Maxx to ask if he could take it back

“Certainly sir, just bring it in to the shop with your receipt and we will exchange it, no problem at all sir”

So off went Wilmott and arrived at the shop only to find a large queue waiting for customer services
Patiently our friend shuffled along with the queue until it was his turn.

“I wish to exchange this item” he pronounced in his most authoritative voice

The young lady took the shirt, looked at it and said
“I am sorry sir but we cannot exchange this shirt or even accept it"

Willmott turned a delicate shade of puce, his face contorted with rage and frustration

“What do you mean you can’t take it back, I telephoned you and you said yes, you would.
I've been waiting in this queue for half and hour - just not good enough - bloody well fed up with you people

“So why can’t you take it back?” he thundered

The girl gave him an old fashioned look and said quietly, but firmly

“Because this is a Matalan Store sir”